This Week's Notes.

4 months alcohol-free, 72hours in Palma & the joy of not being seen.

I’m writing this laying on the beach in the warm Mallorcan sun in a beautiful little bay, we’ve been here since 8am because early bird catches the worm and all that. We’ve set up camp for the day with prime positioning on the beach before its flooded with tourists (its funny how even when you are a tourist yourself everyone else is more touristy than you!) and ready to chill the F out before we fly back home tonight and back to normality.

The last few weeks I’ve been DEEP in book writing zone, I’ve not been showing up on socials in the way I usually do. I just felt such an urge to retreat inwards, so I listened. I’ve been going out of my way to really stay focused and not distracted by the highly distracting world around me because I know I need to, I only have 2 months until my manuscript is due which gives me anxiety to think about!

I thought retreating might prove difficult, because easier said than done and I was sort of riding off the buzz of The Spring Reset (the seasonal group programme I host four times a year) and momentum it always brings me but I was craving some time out of being ‘seen’ so I could go IN and get to all of the deep juicy stuff I needed to pour into my book and also just allow time to reset myself mentally.

I was feeling a bit stuck and a bit stagnant generally - like I just couldn’t find my flow or peace with things, you know?

Not feeling like I’m in my flow is my least favourite feeling because my flow is usually very easily flowing and my peace comes naturally (because the way I live allows it to) so it felt unusual to feel slightly stuck. I guess it was the aftermath of trying to do too many things all at once!! The (exciting but also exhausting) work stuff, the fertility stuff. Life has been LIFING in great ways and hard ways. A tale of two halves- always.

I think in the unhinged social media world we find ourselves living in, it’s so easy to feel lost, left-out or like you’re not making progress if you’re not actively being seen and sharing things you’re doing, stuff you’re achieving or working on or the ways you’re bettering and ‘optimising’ yourself (feeling slightly tired of this word thanks to the Gen XYZ’s of the world, lol- maybe I’m showing my age).

But, let’s face it the real ‘work’ is always the stuff that’s happening when no-one is watching or clapping you along. The real work doesn’t require validation. It just requires consistency and for you to do the things you know you need to do when you need to do them.

Whenever I have these unplanned mini hiatus bursts (that I seem to often randomly and quite spontaneously have!) it’s always because I can feel myself getting overwhelmed and at bursting point like my body is asking me to ‘do the work!’ So I purposely make my world smaller, quieter and less visible to the outside and as a result I always feel like an old layer of myself sheds away, a layer that needed to go, and a brand new layer grows in its place.

If you’re reading this and can resonate with the sense of overwhelm that life brings and also feel like you could do with some time-out so that you can zone inwards to realign with yourself, then its going to feel a bit uncomfortable at first that much is certain. But it’s essential we do make space for this. As women we are wired to constantly be doing, serving and helping everyone else. But the constant output needs replenishment so that we can go back to doing and doing well whilst feeling well. Not just doing for the sake of doing (or in the case of social media, if you have a business / career that relies on this then sharing for the sake of sharing).

I find when I don’t create time-out of my schedule to quieten-down my life, I start to get that same old familiar sense of burn-out creeping in and I know how easy it is for it to take hold and become a problem. This is not an option for me and is why I work and live in seasons, which has become a total game-changer (I wrote a Substack ok this topic HERE if you want to know how I structure and implement this in my life).

So anyway I’ve been writing a lot, tending to our beloved veg patch (one of mine and Sebby’s greatest joint joys!!) finishing my Traditional Chinese Medicine Course (more on this soon) and I even sneaked in a weekend away in Palma with my best friend and work wife Amy, which was heaven.

We’ve spent the weekend eating delicious tapas, walking in the rain and now the rain has finally decided to stop, we’re here soaking-up every ounce of sunshine on the beach. We also drank a few glasses of rosé which, after not drinking for four months, I genuinely really fancied and have thoroughly enjoyed!!

4 months alcohol-free, now what?

I’ve never been a big drinker (minus my uni days when the same definitely cannot be said!) so cutting it out in the name of fertility never really felt like a huge deal to me. Perhaps it didn’t require the label of “I’m not drinking,” as if alcohol had ever been a problem, because it never has been. But I would be lying if I didn’t acknowledge how great I’ve felt by drinking at all, not even at social events when even one glass sometimes has the power to make me feel slightly off (and a tad anxious) the next morning- so labelling it has helped in that sense because it stops the thought process of deciding to have a glass or not at all and it stops the questions. “I’m not drinking” and that is that is how the last 4 months have been for me and its worked well and felt good.

BUT in the same breath, I don’t want to live a life of being fearful of how the odd thing is going to impact my fertility and I don’t intend to start. I know its what I’m doing for the most part that is moving the needle in my health (and bettering my eggs), the whole-food diet I love to eat, the sleep I make sure I get, the clean water I hydrate my body with each day, the sunlight I expose my eyes to every morning and the way I protect my nervous system as much as my reproductive system and the food I put in my weekly Ocado shop.

There is no getting away from the fact that alcohol has zero benefits for our health, especially egg quality though which is what I’m doing my best to support right now so thats why I’m going to continue to be very intentional about it.

This weekend felt like a little pause before stepping into the next chapter of our fertility journey. Before I focus in on the new nutrition protocol I created for myself following my miscarriage recovery and in preparation for our next chapter. So its felt nice to just enjoy the moment for what it was and whilst I’m not going to be actively drinking I will have the very occasional glass of something on the special occasions and I feel very happy about that decision.

So this weekend tapas has been eaten, rosé has been sipped and we’ve had a right laugh. I’ve loved every second of it.

Sometimes a fun girl trip is exactly what the soul needs. Mine certainly did, and I’ve come back feeling ready for whatever comes next. Much more ready than I have done the last few months.

I hope you have a lovely week ahead.

Love, Jess X

P.S. See below for my mini Palma guide, plus the book and bone broth I can’t get enough of!

I’m currently reading

The Wedding People by Alison Espach- I cannot recommend this book enough I’ve been inhaling it on this trip its both funny and moving in equal measures and has been much-needed escapism for me!

Product of the week

Ape Nutrition Bone Broth (EATNOURISHANDGLOW for 10% off)

Quote of the week

“The Intuition already told you. Your only job is to stop arguing with it” (Matt Cooke)

My Palma City Mini Guide

Where to stay

Sant Francesc

Hm Playa Blanc

Where to eat

El Camino

Koa

Ombu

Wellies

Bar Espana

A must visit

The area Santa Catalina for the food market + lots of v cool cafes & wine bars

Brunch / Coffee / Matcha

Surry Hills

BACAN

Doma

Local beach (15-20 mins in an Uber from town centre)

Cala Major

Cala Des Mago (35mins from town centre)